syring_e (syring_e) wrote in jrock_u,

kyo & kaoru

ooc note: a while..while back I was given Kyo since the old Kyo was..erm kicked out I think. I never made a journal because Jen never fixed the list so.. here I am, naka, making my first update even though I've been pring kyo for god knows how long xx;. also I had been dead for a bit, which is why I said kyo was in Kyoto ^^;

The purple haired manager of Barnes & Nobles sat quietly at his kitchen table, looking over the new shipment form. Work really never let him be.

Kyo had been gone for a while to go visit..erm.. 'family' in Kyoto. He made it back in one piece, thankfully, and knocked on kaoru's front door. While he was gone he had tried to call but never managed to get through. And even when he did, he was quickly, and violently, pulled away from the phone so he never managed to speak to Kaoru.

Therefore, he wasn't quite sure if he was even still welcome to the other. He peered out from between strands of freshly bleached blonde hair, round almond eyes focussed on the door infront of him.

Kaoru stood up, walking quickly to the door and opening it. "Kyo! Where have you been?" he asked, pulling the shorter man into the apartment.

Kyo's gaze was on the ground. "I had to go to Kyoto, I'm sorry." Wow.. what happened to the fistey blonde ball of energy that had been dating Kaoru? It was replaced with.. a small broken boy.

Kaoru frowned, looking Kyo over. The boy was wearing long sleeves. "... Kyo..." he said softly. "Stop trying to hide what happened to you."

Kyo looked up quickly and gave a small, quick, smile. It faded as soon as it came. "Nothing happened, Kaoru." He said, his voice lacking any real conviction.

He sighed and locked the door. He picked Kyo up, taking him to the bathroom and setting him on the counter. "Don't lie to me," he said softly. "Show me."

Kyo found it so odd to be lead about by Kaoru once again. But of course, he couldn't disobey him. So Kyo raised his sleves up to reveal a few rather nice sized bruises. He brushed back blonde bangs to show a few cuts across his head and then raised his shirt to show a few more bruises and cuts. On his inner left write was what seemed to be the burn of a cigarette.

Kaoru raised Kyo's wrist, inspecting the wound over before sighing. "Why do you let him do these things to you?" he asked, kissing his wrist softly.

Kyo blinked as Kaoru kissed his wrist. He shrugged a little, because in actuallity Kyo had put the cigarette out on his wrist. Well he had been forced to because he had lost a poker game to his 'uncle'. Such a nice family, ne?

"Did you clean any of these wounds?" he asked, still holding Kyo's wrist.

Kyo nodded. "Mhm, right after.." Kyo wasn't stupid. Yeah he had been broken by now but at least he wasn't stupid..

Kaoru pulled Kyo's shirt from his body, dropping it and pressing his face to the smaller man's chest, smelling him. "Why did you go?" he whispered.

"I had to," he said softly and pet Kaoru's hair gentlty. He wasn't used to the affection, but had missed it for so long. Kyo's gaze was on the floor.

Kaoru closed his eyes, listening to Kyo's heart beat. "You didn't."

Kyo stared down at Kaoru and bit down on his lower lip. "I did." He said and pulled back a little, sliding off of the counter. He peered up at Kaoru. "I was surprised that you even let me in.." Kyo admitted.

He looked at Kyo, hurt clearly on his face. "Why wouldn't I?"

Kyo shrugged, his fingers toying idly with eachother. "I figured you wouldn't like me anymore.. since I left..and all."

"Why would you think that?" he asked, furrowing his brows. Kyo had no idea how much he was hurting Kaoru.

Kyo peered up at him and sort of shrugged. "I don't know.." because he had been told,c onstantly, over the past days or so that he was worthless and useless and no one liked him and he'd die alone and miserable ^0^

"... you do know," he said. "They've told you that all your life... haven't they?"

Kyo sort of shrugged. He didn't even have the conviction to be angry with anyone! He peered down at the floor, what did Kaoru expect?

Kaoru sighed and mussed Kyo's bangs, walking past him. "Kyo.... you don't seem to be able to handle any kind of relationship right now. So... we'll just be friends. You can live here and I'll help you so you can get back into relationships," he said softly. He felt his heart breaking. He knew Kyo needed his help, but Kyo needed to help himself as well.

Kyo's eyes shot up at Kaoru. This..wasn't what he wanted to hear. He swallowed down tears and nodded, his gaze falling to the floor. He was right, you know. You didn't deserve the kindness Kaoru was giving you and now look what you've done.. Kyo stared at the floor.

He saw the hurt in KYo's movements and pulled him into a tight embrace, kissing his hair. "..... Kyo... if ... if you let me love you, all I ask of you, is to love me back. I've been trying and all you do is push me away," he whispered.

Kyo stared up at him and gently leaned again him. His small arms moved to wrap around Kaoru's waist. "Sorry.." he said softly. He didn't want to hurt Kaoru. ever.

"Kyo... will you let me love you?" he asked, pulling back slightly. He cupped Kyo's chin in his forefinger and thumb, looking into his eyes.

Kyo managed, after a few moments, to meet Kaoru's gaze. He nodded gently. He would, of course, but it might take him some time to be able to show how he returned the feelings.

He leaned down, kissing Kyo's lips softly. "Kyo.. I want to make love to you," he whispered.

Kyo blinked. Wow, did Kaoru really miss him that much. "K-Kaoru.." he said, once they had parted."

"Kyo.. if you don't want to, then just say so. I've been wanting to make love to you for some time now. But... everytime I get close... you just move further away from me," he continued whispering.

Kyo stared at him with wide almost nervous eyes. "Kaoru.." he said again and tilted his head to the side. CAN'T IT WAIT?! Was what his brain was screaming at him.

"I don't want you to do this.. if you aren't ready... But Kyo..." he pulled back, letting his hand fall. "I can't wait forever."

Kyo nodded and peered up at him. "I know," he said softly and bit down on his lower lip. He just didn't know..what to do. He still felt so empty.

Kaoru looked down and pulled Kyo into the bedroom. "Go to sleep... you must be tired," he said softly, trying to keep the pain from his tone and succeeding. He gave Kyo a small bow and went back to the kitchen, sitting at the table and sighing heavily, trying to not let the tears fall.

Kyo watched as he left. However empty Kyo might have been, he wasn't stupid, as I mentioned. He followed Kaoru out and sat down on the floor next to Kaoru's chair, peering up at him almost like a lost kitten. wow.

The purple haired man had to blink rapidly at him. "What?" he whispered.

He stood up and hung his head gently. "Kaoru I don't want to make you upset.." he said, nab;e to hide the emotion in his voice. finally there was emotion!

Kaoru looked back to the table, staring at it. "I'm fine,' he said, his tone this time being monotone. "You need your rest. We'll talk in the morning. And... Kyo.. we have a new room mate. His name is Ruki. If he shows up when I'm at work tomorrow, be nice to him."

Kyo blinked and stared at Kaoru. "....." he nodded and then looked away. he knew he had upset Kaoru. He wasn't even sure if kaoru really wanted him there anymore. he turned and padded off towards Kaoru's room. He crawled into the bed, leaving the door open, and clung to one of the pillows. He inhaled deeply.

Kaoru dropped his head softly to the table, breathing softly. He ached. His body ached with need everytime he saw Kyo. His heart ached. His mind ached. He needed him. And he knew that he had hurt Kyo... He stood up, removing his clothes and crawling in the bed behind Kyo, wrapping his arms around the other's waist and burying his face in his hair. "I'm sorry," he whispered.

Kyo turned around in Kaoru's arms, peering at him with wide eyes, holding unfallen tears. "Don't be. It's my fault." he said softly.

"It's not..." he whispered, leaning in and kissing his lips softly. "Let's... just get some rest."

Kyo actually kissed Kaoru back, softly, and hesitantly, but it was a kiss none the less. He nuzzled against Kaoru.

Kaoru smiled softly and snuggled up to him, enjoying the warmth.

Kyo yawned softly, clinging to Kaoru as though his life depended on it. Once he was asleep, he made small whimpering noises.

Kaoru stroked Kyo's hair, whispering softly to him to calm him.

Kyo eventually did calm down, from the sound of Kaoru's voice, and actually fell completely to sleep.
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